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Our second place Middle School category winner was written by Maura Keaney, an eighth grader at the Belmonte Middle School in Saugus. |
When the total darkness covers me I feel like that’s where I belong. Exiled in the blackest parts of all beings. Although some may find that the worst place to exist, I will always belong here. This is my home and I will have it no other way. I would normally not stray into darkness so willingly, but the almost seductive calling that lead me here made such an offer I could not refuse. I was granted peace or so they said. They always say these things. I got a lifetime of nothingness. My soul is so empty that not even the overbearing reality that I was not alone could save me. There are many like me and I can understand why the chose that fatal way out. Some people say that you’re a coward if you die without a fight. The only truth in that is we didn’t fight because we didn’t see the need after what we went through.
It has unfortunately come to this. Submerged in the darkness I can see this is what I have become. A lifeless nothing bound for an endless torture in Hell. That is what I deserve is it not? For one cannot say that Hell is not what they are destined for when it’s printed in front of their face. I can see that for the sin of total solitude, not sharing what I have with others has caused this knowledge and I am forced to accept it. I cannot deny that I am just another any longer. My trusty friend and I are through with the pain and have now decided to end it. Who is my friend? Throughout this time, I have been telling myself I have no friends and I never will. This is different. This friend will end the pain in time for everyone to see I am not as different as they.
Hate. A word that can kill so slowly that you don’t even know it until it strikes you emotionless. This is also why I am here. The numbness that has sunk in over these ultimately horrifying years. Being alone I could almost handle, but being totally numb inside drove to insanity. And now with this night and this mood in the air, it’s so perfect for my plan to go into action. The hate toward me is no longer going to follow me. I can be at real peace. Well isn’t that what was promised to me in the first place? So I guess it wasn’t an empty promise after all.
So here I am on Halloween night. My friend and I will make noise tonight. I have the pieces in place and all I have to do is aim. Its so simple I couldn’t believe I didn’t think of it sooner. Now all I have to do is pull this trigger and.
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